How to help someone who is trying to conceive
How to help someone who is trying to conceive
If you are trying to help someone who is trying to conceive, keep a positive and supportive attitude.
When a woman tries to conceive, she and her partner get all kinds of advice and curious questions. Most of the time the advice is not helpful, and the funny questions only increase her stress. Here is a list of things that people often say to someone trying to conceive , followed by something that should be said that will be more supportive and less stressful.
Don’t say I heard you’re trying to conceive.
Instead: You can say something positive about some other aspect of her life or just ask how things are going in general. Leave the conversation open, so she’ll feel comfortable discussing it with you.
Also, if a woman is taking fertility drugs, she has a lot of hormones in her body that make her emotional. Depending on where she is in the fertility cycle, she may feel some tentative hope or be very depressed because the last cycle didn’t work. Either way, asking her about it may trigger emotions that she’s not ready to discuss with you right away.
Why did you wait so long? Is your maximum fertility at 20?
Instead: You can say something positive about someone getting pregnant in their late 30s or early 40s and ending up with a wonderful child.
Most people know when a woman’s peak fertility and the women who are trying to get pregnant are extremely conscientious and don’t need to be reminded. If you have a great story, like your hairdresser had her first child in 42 and she’s a wonderful girl, then share that. The more positive stories you share, the better.
Don’t say I’m trying to lie on your back and lift my legs after sex?
Instead: If you must go there, use non-confrontational, non-degrading language. Something like: “You’ve probably already explored this option, but I just wanted to mention it because it worked for my husband’s cousin. He told me about it when we saw his baby last weekend.
Remember, most women trying to conceive have explored all treatments, even non-medical interventions. Whatever you want to mention, you’ve probably already explored it. You can also say something about your belief that you will eventually become a mother because you are smart and tenacious and you will stick with it until you get your dream baby.
Don’t say don’t worry about it, if you’re under a lot of stress, things get worse.
Say instead: Is there anything I can help you with that will relieve some of your stress? How about we go to the day spa next weekend? Or, I know you’re probably running a lot right now, can I leave some food that just needs to warm up, so you have one less thing to deal with?
Women who are struggling to conceive are under a lot of stress and they know it. Telling them not to stress just makes the situation more stressful because that’s something they can’t control. Frankly, at this point, not being able to control the stress is another way to make them feel guilty, so reminding them doesn’t help. But, on the other hand, helping with something does.
Don’t say You’re making it too hard, if you stop trying so hard, it will happen naturally.
Instead: You can say that you seem to be doing everything you can to achieve your goal, that’s wonderful. I know you’ll be a wonderful father. The truth is that most people try themselves for at least a year before seeking help for infertility. By the time they are actively trying to get pregnant, using infertility interventions, there is a diminishing ovarian reserve and every cycle counts. They don’t have time to just stop and wait for nature to take its course. Nature had its chance, now they are in the active intervention stage, which is right where they need to be.
Don’t say I’ve heard that Samantha’s pregnant again? Instead: You can share another gossip you’ve heard that doesn’t involve pregnancy. The woman trying to conceive has probably already heard the gossip about the pregnancy and processed it herself in private. Pas de nécessité que de se remarquent que des femmes parfois sont prégnant, il y avait déjà tout en outre qu’il y avait tout en outre qu’il y avait uniquement. Pointing this out to her only makes her feel worse. Don’t say Why don’t you just adopt? Instead: You can say you deserve a family, you’re going to be a great mother, and I know it will happen for you eventually. While most people are convinced of adoption on some level, most don’t know how much time, effort, and money it takes to make it happen. This is especially true if you want to adopt a baby. Aucun is like shopping, it is a long and involved process that involves selling out to birth mothers and social service agencies. Adopting is a fantastic option that most people undergoing infertility treatment have explored, but most women trying to get pregnant with fertility treatments want to be sure that the treatments will work. These are just a few ideas that can help you know what to say and do when you are trying to support a woman who is struggling to get pregnant. The important thing to remember is not to add stress to her life, she already has a lot of that. So, don’t be afraid to talk to your friend who is trying to conceive. Anything you can do, or say, that won’t add more stress and make her feel supported will be appreciated.